I'm stupid.Okay fine, I may not be stupid, but I just feel stupid. I feel so stupid because my results for my midterm papers are terrible. Bad.I did not get the result like what i expected. Banyak A-. I dapat account A, tapi lain A-, B. I've had no idea what i was studying before. I rasa macam something tak kena dengan result i. Sebab I rasa I belajar & I dapat jawab. Kawan I yang belajar together with me semua dapat result gempak. What have i done? If that appears bad to me, then don't even bother asking what my parents think of it. The answer is just obvious; it's TERRIBLE. Well they may not tell me straight to my face that my results were just terrible, but they don't have to. I can see it in their eyes, I can sense it in their voices.
Hmm.
I rasa ada benda yang tak berkatkan i belajar. Mungkin I ada sakit kan hati orang secara tak sengaja or what not. I don't know, maybe I am becoming more and more dumb as the days go by. I have trouble concentrating in class and my mind constantly wanders away as my teacher lectures in front of the classroom. I'm so vulnerable to distractions that it's killing me with frustration. The cogs and gears in my brain are gradually reducing their speed, making my brain dimmer by the day.
But you know, azrin, ira, who used to main-main pun dapat standard result macam i. What the...? I yang stay up sampai late night pun macamni. I patut berubah jadi apa lagi ni. Hmmm.
But you know, azrin, ira, who used to main-main pun dapat standard result macam i. What the...? I yang stay up sampai late night pun macamni. I patut berubah jadi apa lagi ni. Hmmm.
I'm frustrated, because i'm a failure at everything!
I don't know what made me change so much in a span of less than a year, and this change I don't like. I'm losing my mind. It hurts me. I nak tukar diploma but lagi 5 bulan je. Yeahh rite, sekejab je i kat sini. I akan cuba lagi yang terbaik. Ya Allah, bantu lah hambamu ini Ya Allah aku merayu. Murahkan lah rezeki ku.
Who always there for me, thank you sebab bagi semangat dekat finas. Seriously. Thanks sbb tolong finas.
There's one thing,
I risau dengan mama i. Maa, i'm really sorry. I didnt make it. Tapi kaknash janji, kaknash akan balas balik with much more better result. I love you so much. Sorry and thanks for everything.
The result. Find me.
Sigh. Sometimes, writing my thoughts to let the world know how I feel just makes me feel so much better. Unfortunately, it failed this time.
I need my friends right now. But I just don't feel like talking to anyone.
Hmm. I feel like a slug. God why am I so EMO today? -.-
